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Looking For Your Queer Community? Here Are 10 Things You Should Know

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Read with Pride - LGBTQ+ blogs and articles May 8, 2026

Finding your "people" can feel like a quest straight out of an epic fantasy novel. You know the vibe: the lone protagonist wandering through a dense forest (or, let’s be real, a crowded city) looking for the hidden kingdom where they finally fit in. For many in the LGBTQ+ community, especially if you’re just starting to explore your identity or have recently moved to a new area, that search for community can feel daunting.

But here’s the secret: community isn’t a destination you reach; it’s something you build, one connection at a time. Whether you’re looking for a group of friends to discuss the latest MM romance release with or you’re seeking a support network that understands your specific journey, building that circle is essential for your well-being.

At eBooks by Dick Ferguson, we believe that stories are often the first place we find community. But eventually, we want to bring that feeling of belonging off the page and into our real lives. Here are 10 things you should know about finding and fostering your queer community in 2026.

1. A Guide to Understanding Asexuality and Aromanticism for Allies

If we’re going to talk about community, we have to talk about all of it. One of the most important things you can do to build a truly inclusive space is to understand the "A" in LGBTQIA+. Often misunderstood or overlooked, the asexual (Ace) and aromantic (Aro) communities are vital parts of our world.

For allies, and even for those within the gay and bi community, understanding that attraction isn't a "one size fits all" is huge. Asexuality is a spectrum where people experience little to no sexual attraction, while aromanticism involves experiencing little to no romantic attraction.

Why does this matter for community building? Because when we assume everyone is looking for a "steamy MM romance" style hookup, we accidentally alienate our Ace and Aro brothers. Building a community means creating spaces where a man’s value isn't tied to his sexual activity or his relationship status. In gay literature, we’re seeing more "slow burn" or "platonic soulmate" tropes that reflect these lived experiences. Being an ally to Ace/Aro folks means listening more than you speak and validating their identity as "queer enough."

Minimalist illustration of two men on a park bench, representing asexual and aromantic MM bonds.

2. Shared Hobbies are the Ultimate Icebreakers

Forget the loud, strobe-lit clubs for a second (unless that’s your jam, then by all means!). Some of the strongest queer communities are built around shared interests. Think about what you love. Are you into fitness? Look for a gay-friendly run club or a gym that prioritizes queer safety. Do you love gaming? There are countless "Gaymer" groups online and in-person.

For the bibliophiles among us, a gay book club is a goldmine. There’s something special about sitting in a room (or a Zoom call) with other men and dissecting the emotional weight of a gay contemporary romance or the high-stakes tension of a gay thriller. It gives you a specific topic to talk about, taking the pressure off the "small talk" that many of us find so terrifying.

If you're looking for something that hits deep, you might want to check out the discussion around The King of Spades and Broken Roses, which dives into personal M/M themes that are perfect for community conversation.

3. Your Home Can Be Your First Sanctuary

Before you head out to find the masses, make sure your home feels like a place where you are allowed to be yourself. This is especially important for those who might not be fully "out" in every area of their lives.

Surround yourself with things that reflect your identity. This could be a pride flag on the wall, art by queer creators, or a digital library filled with LGBTQ+ eBooks. Having a collection of gay fiction on your nightstand is a quiet but powerful way to affirm your identity every single day. When you feel secure in your own space, you carry that confidence with you when you go out to meet others.

4. Local LGBTQ+ Centers are Goldmines

We often forget that there are dedicated organizations whose entire mission is to help us find each other. Local LGBTQ+ centers are about much more than just crisis support. They host movie nights, workshops, legal clinics, and social mixers.

If you’re looking for popular gay books or recommendations for local events, these centers often have community boards. They are a bridge between you and the resources you didn't even know you needed. Whether you're looking for a mentor or just someone to grab a coffee with, the center is a great place to start.

Illustration of an MM couple exploring an LGBTQ+ community center to connect with the queer community.

5. The Digital World is Real Community

In 2026, the line between "online" and "real life" has practically vanished. Apps like Lex or Discord servers dedicated to gay authors and queer fiction are legitimate places to find connection.

For younger folks, spaces like TrevorSpace provide a moderated, safe environment. For the rest of us, finding a niche community, like a subreddit for MM fantasy or a Facebook group for gay historical romance, can lead to lifelong friendships. Just remember to take the same precautions you would anywhere else: stay safe, but keep your heart open.

6. Social Justice is a Community Hub

Queer identity has always been rooted in activism. If you want to meet people who share your values, get involved in local social justice movements. Whether it’s volunteering for an election, working with a food bank that serves the LGBTQ+ community, or marching for trans rights, these spaces are where you’ll find people who are passionate, engaged, and ready to support one another.

There’s a unique bond that forms when you’re working toward a common goal. It moves the relationship from "people I know" to "people I trust."

7. Understand the Power of Intersectionality

Finding your community means recognizing that the "queer community" is not a monolith. A white cisgender gay man’s experience is going to be vastly different from a Black trans man’s or a disabled bisexual man’s.

To find a community that is healthy and vibrant, we have to look at intersectionality. This means acknowledging how race, class, disability, and age intersect with our queerness. When you’re looking for a group, look for one that celebrates this diversity. At Read with Pride, we strive to highlight M/M books that reflect a wide range of experiences, because every man deserves to see himself as the hero of a gay love story.

8. Don’t Assume, Ask

One of the biggest barriers to community is the fear of saying the wrong thing. We’ve all been there. But the best way to navigate this is to stop assuming. Don't assume someone’s pronouns, their partner's gender, or their level of comfort with certain topics.

Community members generally prefer it when you ask a respectful question rather than make an awkward assumption. "What are your pronouns?" or "How do you prefer to be identified?" are great ways to show that you are a safe and considerate person to be around.

9. Look for the "Emotionally Invested" Spaces

If you’re a fan of emotional MM books or high-angst themes, you know that some stories just stay with you. The same goes for communities. Look for spaces where people aren't afraid to be vulnerable.

A community where you can only talk about the weather isn't going to sustain you. Look for the "emotionally invested" readers and thinkers, the people who want to talk about the themes in a book like Dust and Bone. These are the people who will be there for you when life gets a little too real.

Vulnerable MM couple embracing in a library, capturing the emotional depth of gay romance novels.

10. Patience is Your Best Friend

Building a community takes time. You might go to three different meetups and not click with anyone, and that’s okay. It’s like finding the perfect gay novel; sometimes you have to read a few chapters of a few different books before you find the one that you can’t put down.

Don’t rush the process. Be patient with yourself and with the people you meet. True friendship and community are built on a foundation of shared experiences and time. Keep showing up, keep being your authentic self, and eventually, the forest won't seem so dense anymore.

Conclusion

Whether you are looking for new gay releases to read by yourself or a group of guys to go hiking with, remember that you deserve to belong. The world of gay fiction and MM romance is a beautiful starting point, but the community waiting for you out there is even better.

Read with Pride, and live with pride. Your community is out there looking for you, too.

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Hey Dick! Here are three blog post options for tomorrow:

  1. "From Enemies to Lovers: Why We Can’t Get Enough of This MM Romance Trope" – A deep dive into the psychology of the "rivals" dynamic in gay fiction.
  2. "Summer Reading List: 5 Gay Thrillers to Keep You on the Edge of Your Seat" – A curated list of high-stakes, fast-paced M/M novels for the warmer months.
  3. "The Art of the Slow Burn: Why Emotional Depth Matters in Gay Love Stories" – Exploring how authors build tension without rushing the physical connection.